An Update on Us

  It's been awhile since I've posted onto my blog and I feel as if I've let myself down.  I have been through more trials and tribulations than I could keep up with and in turn haven't posted anything :(  A lot has happened and so I feel the need to update before I can commit myself to doing this blog the proper way.  I fully intend to make this a functioning blog with consistent posts and all. HaHa!! We shall see how that goes. But I digress. Where should I begin?  Parker-Michael is now 6yrs old and will be entering into the First grade in the fall.  I took this last birthday of his really hard.  I never actually put much thought into it until it happened but once your baby is older than 5 you can really feel the difference.  It's as if you can actually feel the change of stages. Birth to 5yrs is such a special time in a mothers life but it is also a blur. I just wanted it back.  Those adventures were fun and a lot less scary than the adventures we will face as the "school-aged child" stage.  Things seemed somehow easier for me when he was 5 or younger. Lol  However, I am ready and he will be too. We will get through it one way or another. 
          His kindergarten year was a bit difficult.  I received notes and conduct sheets almost everyday.  You just have to know my child. He is kind and smart. I just couldn't understand what was going on.  I had a meeting with the teachers and they explained to me that he wasn't "bad" and he never did anything with malicious intent. Whew!!! That's a relief because I know for sure my child has never been so much as mean to anyone or anything.  The problem was, he couldn't keep still.  He couldn't learn anything because he couldn't focus.  Yea no kidding...when I say he is jumping off the walls, he is literally jumping off the walls.  We discussed the situation and inevitably decided to check with a doctor.  The doctor explained that he was giving him a diagnosis of ADHD.  In later posts I will discuss my decision on whether to put him on medication or not.
         On top of all that...this single mommy has bipolar II disorder.  This means I am more likely to become depressed than manic.  It is something I struggle with daily and I am on medications to help.  I will also post later on why I decided to take these meds as well as what it really means to have bipolar disorder.  It's been a crazy inconsistent ride and I am finally ready to get a handle on things and start sharing our struggles.  I hope that maybe through all of our ups and downs someone out there can maybe find solace in our stories.
         Oh, one last thing I'd like to add to my little up date. I've met someone and I just can't wait to share what it's like to date someone while being a single, bipolar mom raising a very active son! 

*Until next time...Make everyday a story worth telling!!!! 

Morning sickness and I'm not even pregnant!

I was lucky enough not to have morning sickness with my son when I was pregnant. But no one ever told me that I would experience it later...much later....five years later to be exact.  I am sure that all moms will relate once I explain why I have (morning) sickness now!  Being a first time mom to a five year old has it's challenges.  This is the age they experience a life time of firsts.  They being school, start playing in sports, lose their teeth, learn an abundance of new rules, encounter bullies, get into trouble by someone other than a parent, etc. It's an over whelming experience for a small child! However. It's just as overwhelming to a first time parent.  You have to send your child away every morning into a school much larger than daycare with older children that know too much. I thought to myself the very first day...it's going to be wonderful to see how much knowledge he will gain. I didn't realize that he would come home and tell me that the kids on the bus hit him and call him a little bitch.  Yikes! How do I handle that?  Or that he would have notes sent home because the pooped his pants (especially since he's been potty trained since 18 mths.) every day this week.  I didn't stop to think that he may not respond well to someone's rules other than my own especially if they seem futile in my eyes.  Then starting to play a sport for the first time proved to be more of a challenge than I had anticipated. I thought it would be good for him to mingle with other kids and learn discipline and how to work well with his team members.  Instead he is silently being ridiculed because his father isn't in his life to teach him "the game". Five and six year old's join a team so young to learn the rules of a sport and work their way up from there not to play to win.  Yet, I've experienced parents who push for their child to win instead of allowing other children to learn.  The coaches (thankfully) are trying their best to make it all fair.  During one of the latest games my son had a chance to shoot the ball but saw the other team trying to stop him so he ran to the other side to make the shot.  Some of the kids on his team criticized him for it and later refused to pass the ball to him.  Another thing I am not certain how to handle.  All these things added up = morning sickness (emotionally induced but none the less nauseating). Stay tuned for more single momma learning experiences.....